Question: I’ve got SO MANY things to do over the next few weeks and months, how can I get them done and stop myself from going INSANE?

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They’re all in different categories as well – business, family, legal, financial, social – AUGUHUHUGUAGHHH!!!

Help me! I need some wise words.

It’s Not Romance You Want, It’s How You Hope Romance Will Change You

Christiana Rivers

“…Let me love you
And I will love you
Until you learn to love yourself
– Ne-Yo

You don’t want the flowers, the kisses, the hugs, the s and the close proximity as much as you want to be seen. As much as you want to be trusted, to be shared with, to be cared for. Romance is the way that we show people we love that we love them in ways that surprise them. Whether it’s as extreme as a flash mob or as subtle and sweet as a love note and a yellow rose. You crave this love. You subscribe to this kind of love on YouTube. You dream of having this kind of love in real life. You are hoping that by meeting someone who loves your scars and yourself that it will be easier for you to love them too. And I am here to remind you, that you do not need to wait to learn to love yourself.

You want someone to heal you with their romance. To hug the broken pieces whole, to stay the night and fight your monsters off. You are hoping for romance to distract you from your pain, yourself. You are hoping to go blind to the crappy things that come with life. You want to become obsessive about your love interest’s smile, their laugh, their honesty. You want a life partner who chooses to be there and would choose to be with you again. You hope that it will help you to believe in the good things again. You hope romance will foster a newer sense of security in you.

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The issue with building your security off of your partner’s lips grazing yours or when they lavish all of their time on you is that if they leave, they take your security blanket with them. Your nights get colder, you feel the pain you were ignoring, you blame yourself and them, you cry alone instead of smiling to yourself.

Don’t allow a love interest to lead you into loving yourself with their romance towards you or with your excitement to romance them. Instead, decide to learn to love and spend time with yourself now. Don’t fall for romance because you think you need it to heal you or change how you see you. Let romance come your way when it does and choose to love yourself in the meantime. Love has a lot of ordinary days mixed in with the extraordinary romantic days. Make sure you learn to love yourself on the ordinary days just as much as on special days. Make sure you love your partner, not for their romance, but because they are there. Love without the co-dependency.

Don’t stop taking yourself on dates just because you met someone who will do that for you. Continue to build memories with you and remember why you are worthy of love. Continue to love your life and to keep your hands open to love as it comes, and if it goes, don’t slam the door. Whisper “thank you”, appreciate what you learned, grieve the loss, and continue choosing to yourself anyway. TC mark

Question: Why do I dream in different languages?

I’m Lithuanian, so when I was a kid, my dreams were in Lithuanian. But when I moved to England and started using/learning English more, my dreams were in English. Why did it switch? Is it because it’s my dominant language?

Also I sometimes dream in French (maybe it’s because I’m learning French). But it’s just so weird how my family dream in Lithuanian but I dream in English. What’s the explination?

Question: Gender Studies: questions for gender study professors and students studying gender Studies?

Why do you think manspreading is an issue?

Why do you think there is more than 2 genders?

Why do you claim you’re against racism but yet spend all day hating white people?

Why should all Muslims not be held responsible for terrorism but then all white people are responsible for slavery? How does that make sense?

Why is eating tacos considered racist?

Why is feminism a golorfied man hating group?

Why don’t all lives matter?

Why do you people think you’re morally good people when you’re actually the most stupidest and biggest a $$holes on earth? The most stupid*

10 Signs You’re Not Lazy, You’re ‘Selectively Motivated’ – And That’s A Good Thing

Franca Gimenez

When you look around your life and think: I could be more fit, I should have more money, I need to be doing more work, maybe the reason you’re not isn’t because you’re lazy or inherently unworthy, but because you do not care about those things as much as society is making you think you should.

The world conditions us to think that we have to be everything, all the time. That once we conquer one area of our lives, we need to put our energy toward fixing another.

Maybe you’re not working on the book because you really don’t want to write, even though you like the idea of being a writer. Maybe you aren’t getting in better shape because you’ve been conditioned to think there’s something wrong with your body in the first place. Maybe you’re not working toward running your own business because you only think you want to.

Sometimes, the thing that we can’t seem to fix isn’t meant to be fixed, and what’s distressing to us is that we are having a hard time accepting that it is the way it is.

But successful people don’t do this. They don’t waste their energy on things that don’t matter, or that they don’t care about. Here, how to know if you’re one of them.

1. When you aren’t genuinely inspired by something, you become paralyzed. You have a very hard time forcing yourself to do anything you don’t really want to.

2. You frequently give yourself a hard time for not doing “more.” In a world that conditions you to believe you need to be more, more, more, sometimes you fail to recognize everything you have done in the face of everything that you’re still struggling to juggle.

3. You’re not afraid to give up on what’s not working. A lot of people stay in the wrong jobs, commit themselves to projects they know aren’t right, or stay with partners they don’t actually get along with because they are afraid to disturb the status quo. Sometimes “giving up” is the most liberating and important thing you can do, and you would rather people judge you for changing than not do what you know is right in your heart.

4. When it comes to anything from reading books to attending classes in school, you excel when you’re genuinely interested, and just get by when you’re not. It’s not that you’re inherently less smart than other students, it’s that you can’t feign interest in things that don’t apply or resonate with you.

5. You believe you have a big purpose in life, one that’s far more than just going to work, paying the bills, and waiting around to die.

6. You don’t want to spend all of your energy each day working on creating other people’s dreams. You’re motivated by knowing you’re creating something for yourself.

7. You’d rather be fulfilled than comfortable. Being selectively motivated doesn’t mean you’re quick to give up or choose the easier path, it just means you’re only willing to suffer for what’s really worth it.

8.  What you care about is what motivates you. What you’re good at is what motivates you. Those two things, when done in tandem, create your purpose. You realize that the things you like are not random, they are fundamentally a part of what you are supposed to do here.

9. You feel disproportionately motivated when it comes to “getting your life together.” You will happily spend 11 hours of your day working on your creative projects, but can’t get yourself to care about decorating your apartment better, or having more stylish clothing. A lot of things that other people seem to care about a lot don’t always register as important to you.

10. You’re willing to sacrifice some parts of your life to put your energy toward others. Maybe you wear a “personal uniform” each day so your first energy in the morning goes toward something other than how you appear. Maybe you’re choosing to stay single for a period of time because your focus needs to be primarily on yourself. Maybe you’ve moved to a cheaper city so you’re able to pursue more freelance dreams. The point is: you’re willing to do anything for what you care about, and you’re not afraid to discard what you know won’t matter in the end. TC mark

Question: Is a bank holiday a public holiday (UK)?

Can’t seem to find clear clarification, but I assume all bank holidays are public holidays but not all public holidays are bank holidays. It’s just that the bus I have to get for my first day at work tomorrow has a Sunday and public holiday service, whilst other timetables from the same bus company mostly say Sunday and bank holiday, and obviously tomorrow is a bank holiday.